"Bei when you’re gone, I’m going to dream of you” – Ana, last week, in her kitchen at night while drinking cacao before The Road to El Dorado movie night.
I’m writing this post from my porch because my computer is charged and I’m feeling sentimental tonight. The moon is almost full, the crickets are singing and it didn’t rain today so the bugs aren’t too terrible. My borrowed cat Luna is on my lap nibbling on my fingers as I type, and I don’t even mind. After two years in the Peace Corps, there is very little that can faze me.
Today Victor, Domingo, and I worked on putting another coat of mortar on the water tank while Lleya cooked us lunch of rice with a tomato, onion, and jiraca (foraged leafy green than I love) topping. Then the Vejerano siblings, Victor, and I harvested oranges, I lost count at around 60. Then I helped Dionicio practice for his English exam on Wednesday for a couple hours. Then I made brownies with my host parents. They fed me dinner of rice & sardines – the classic meal – while we waited for them to bake. Then I played games of checkers with Victor, Jairo, Roderik, and Pricila until I was too tired to play another and retired for the night, but of course not before playing their favorite songs from the Moana soundtrack.
When I left our makeshift English classroom today – an old chalkboard hanging from some bent rebar in the corner of the chicken coop and a plastic lawn chair for Dionicio – he asked me the usual (mostly in English! He’s getting so much better!)
D: When can we study again? Will you be in your house tomorrow?
Me: Yes, at night.
D: Thursday?
Me: Yes.
D: Friday?
Me: Yes.
D: Saturday?
Me: Yes.
D: Sunday?
Me: Yes.
D: Monday?
Me: Yes, at night.
D: Tuesday?
Me: Dude, Tuesday is my despedida (going away party). It’s a day to celebrate. I’m not going to teach English that day.
D: And then you’re gone? Bei…why do you have to go?
And I literally saw his face fall as he realized how soon I’m leaving, and how I’m simply not going to be here anymore. Although I’m not going too far and I can visit whenever I have free time, it’ll feel really different not actually living here. I feel ya, Dionicio. I’m excited to be done and I’m ready to move on to my new role…but I’m going to miss these days a lot.
The past few weeks have been full of goodbyes. First, the artisan group despedida! What a beautiful celebration. It was mostly for Zach, because he was the one who worked with the artisans as one of his primary projects, so I was shocked with they called me up as well to receive gifts and give palabras! I was presented with two small chacaras made of natural fibers (my favorite), a homemade diente’d bag, and a diente’d headband. There were speeches, some tears, the most incredible meal, an entire barrel full of chicha dulce, and lots of photos. The generosity of the artisan group never ceased to amaze me. They gave me so much without expecting anything in return.
T
100% not posed. Zach made a fart joke, and Marcelino lost it. This is us reacting to his reaction.
I went to Sophia’s despedida in Quebrada Mamey. She planned a whole bunch of fun games for her gente, and then a bunch of them spoke, prayed, and sang about how much she meant to them in the community. It was incredible to see the outpouring of love and emotion. Again, there were tears. The next day we hiked over to Zach’s despedida in Cerro Mesa. More speeches, giveaways, hugs, photos. Then we hiked out and I got to spend two final nights with my closest friends before they left Panama. It’s not going to be the same without them, and it was really tough saying goodbye.
I went to Sophia’s despedida in Quebrada Mamey. She planned a whole bunch of fun games for her gente, and then a bunch of them spoke, prayed, and sang about how much she meant to them in the community. It was incredible to see the outpouring of love and emotion. Again, there were tears. The next day we hiked over to Zach’s despedida in Cerro Mesa. More speeches, giveaways, hugs, photos. Then we hiked out and I got to spend two final nights with my closest friends before they left Panama. It’s not going to be the same without them, and it was really tough saying goodbye.
After Zach's despedida. Raquel (dark green nagua) and Walter (orange tshirt) have been good friends of mine as well.
Me, Jake, DJ, Michael, Zach, Sophia. Five people I love very much.
I have a week left in site. I’m uneasy leaving things here in the community unfinished – namely, the aqueduct improvement that is still incomplete and won’t be done when I leave. Then the two newly formed water committees that I wish I had been able to train more, latrines we built that are still not in use, baking classes that I never got to…there’s a whole laundry list of things. My fast-paced American agenda clashed with the leisurely Panamanian agenda, much frustration ensued on both sides, things got put off, and time ran out. But it’s okay because I know I did as much as I could, and there have been several good things that we’ve accomplished recently in the 11th hour. First - I did a daylong seminar for the Bajo Conejo water committee. I spent a lot of time planning it so I was annoyed that the president didn’t show up… but oh well. The members of the committee that did come learned about the responsibilities of each member of the directive, Ministry of Health laws, proper household water treatment and storage, aqueduct maintenance, and did some team-building exercises. Second, Isaías, Javier, and I built a latrine for two of the few families in the community who until recently didn’t have any sort of latrine and pooped in the creek/woods, so this is a huge step up. Lastly, the sheets of zinc for a new health pavilion that Enrique, Vidal, and I solicited a year ago from our representative (if you remember this from my post from a year ago, major props to you) were finally delivered!! Seeing this come full circle gave me a sliver of satisfaction.
Eduardo's whatsapp status. An honor to be featured with such flattering graphics, lol
On July 30th, I finished my year of 1-second videos. I had started this on September 14th, 2016, the day we swore in as PCVs, and had about 10 months’ worth of video until my phone got stolen on the 4th of July last year. I hadn’t backed up my videos and lost it all. Back up your stuff, y’all!! So I started over and finally finished a year. Watch it here!
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